The 10 most Australian things that happened in 2017

Woman throws shark out of ocean pool

The words ‘real estate agent’ and ‘shark’ often appear in the same sentence, but not normally like this. Melissa Hatheier hit the headlines in October when her real estate office uploaded a video of their “in-house shark wrangler” wrestling the little fella out of a Cronulla rock pool, because the slippery sucker was interrupting her morning swim.

Vegemite icy poles actually exist

Don’t check your calendar, it’s not April 1 – this is a legit dessert that Vegemite wants you to try. Just add sugar, cocoa, honey, vanilla, milk, cream and cornflour for a frozen ‘treat’ that looks like chocolate ice cream but most definitely doesn’t taste like it.

Larry the Lobster fails to sell at auction

From the Big Banana in Coffs Harbour to the Big Wheelbarrow in Port Hedland and everywhere in between, Australians love a big thing. Well, Larry the Lobster might possibly be an exception, after the 17-metre-tall crustacean failed to attract a single bid at auction in September for the bargain-basement price of $300,000.

Prince William goes viral with a pair of budgie smugglers

No, the Duke of Cambridge wasn’t caught in a state of undress – that’s more his brother’s speed, or at least it was pre-Meghan Markle. This story is about Australian rugby union star Kurtley Beale posing for a royal photo with Wills wearing little more than a smile on his face and a pair of green-and-gold lolly bags on his backside.

Territory toilet named world’s best bog

We’ve heard of ‘crap views’ but this is ridiculous. The ‘cliffhanger loo’ overlooking the crocodile-infested white-sand beaches of the Garig Gunak Barlu National Park in a remote corner of the Northern Territory was awarded ‘Best Location’ at July’s inaugural International Toilet Tourism Awards, which apparently is a thing.

Teenager mauled by croc trying to impress British backpacker

We’ve all done stupid things for love, but nothing quite like 18-year-old Lee De Paauw in March. Smitten by a British backpacker and fuelled by “about 10 cups of goon”, the teenager leapt into Innisfail’s Johnstone River to test his watertight theory that crocodiles are less likely to bite a local than a foreigner… before a croc make a mockery of the experiment by treating Lee’s left arm like a chicken drumstick. The good news? Our intrepid hero escaped, and even scored a date with his crush for his trouble.

Australia suffers prawn shortage

Nothing says ‘Aussie Christmas’ like pavlova, pool toys and plates packed with prawns – but the price of the sought-after seafood has surged this summer, with some punters having to part with $50 a kilo just to get the Chrissy favourite on the table this festive season. And as far as Australian national crises go, pricey prawns are right up there.

Australia’s oldest wombat turns 31

If you feel old after hitting the big three-oh, spare a thought for Winnie the Wombat, who’s already outlived her life expectancy by five or six years at the ripe old age of 31. Winnie tucked into her 31st birthday cake at Canberra’s National Zoo in December, to the delight of her thousands of Facebook friends.

Newspaper drops a C-bomb on the front page

The NT News is famous for its headlines, but this one about Treasurer Scott Morrison was especially saucy. If you can’t spot it, ask your parents.

Sydney names Ferry McFerryface

Sydneysiders insisted on the mirthful moniker through a public poll – and whether you think it’s a cringey re-hash of a stale British gag or a sparkling example of larrikin wit, the story falls firmly in the ‘only in Australia’ category.